I have discovered that Xanga is vastly superior to Live Journal so I am switching over . . Here is the link:
http://www.xanga.com/home.aspx?user=oooo88oooo |
I enjoy taking late night walks. I have always enjoyed them due to the peace and quiet; I feel like I can think clearer. Recently, I have been taking more of these due to the fireflies and warm weather. The sight of thousands of flickering fireflies contrasted by the dark trees is just amazing!
Anyways, one night I was thinking about the new Star Wars movie (the fireflies reminded me of light sabers perhaps?). My thoughts kept returning to Anakin Skywalker and his journey to the Dark Side.
In this movie, young Anakin Skywalker taps into the power of the Dark Side because he wanted to become a more powerful fighter. This works for a while, but in the end the Darkside corrupted him and he became Darth Vader.
I could be wrong, but I believe the 'Dark side' that Anakin was tapping into was the energy behind his own anger, fear and pride. Pride that stemmed from becoming such a great fighter at such a young age, anger and fear from all sorts of things (watch the movie!). There is a lot of energy behind these emotions and Anakin used it to increase his skills (for a little while anyways).
I thought about how anger and pride has been motivating me, my own Dark Side. Here is an example:
Like everyone, I have experienced my share of rejection, especially in the past. Rejection really hurts, as I am sure all of you know.
As a psychology major, I have learned that "underlining hurt is anger and underlining anger is hurt". They are opposite sides of the same coin and they come as a package deal. In exploring some of these past rejections, I am starting to realize that this is true; there is anger underlining some my past hurts.
I have some pride to go along with this anger. I believe I have been growing a lot and I am starting to believe that some pride has seeped in the progress (same as Anakin). With growth there is always a danger of pride seeping in.
My pride tells me to hold on to the anger; it says I am entitled to it. I further rationalize holding on to it saying that I can use it to drive me to become a better person. I have noticed that when I am angry I work harder and get more done. However, I cannot overlook the corrupting influence that pride and harbored anger have.
In all honesty, my motivation is not so pure. Sure there are good reasons I want to grow, but there are bad ones as well. One bad reason I want to improve is to rub my success in the faces of those who rejected me. . not a loving, Christian thing to do. I wrote this down recently:
"I can't wait for my high school reunion. I want to rub my success in the face of every popular kid who as ever picked on me, every girl who has ever shot me down, and every teacher who never believed in me. I hope they feel inferior and flawed in my presence just as I once felt inferior and flawed in theirs."
This statement reeks of anger and pride, which I need to let go of. I do not want to suffer the same fate as young Anakin for if I did choose to follow through and 'rub my success in their faces' I would become one of 'them'. I would of sank to their level and start to cross over to the Dark side! I cannot let that happen! Lord help me. |
I just completed this really cool book called "Flow" by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi (we shall call him MC). This book discussed the psychology of happiness.
MC started off stating that happiness is the most sought out goal in all of humanity (would you not agree?). One reason we value wealth, power, and beauty is because it gives the appearance of happiness.
The truth is (and research backs this) there is no real correlation between happiness and beauty/power/wealth. Happiness is attainable by most anyone in any environment. Granted, it takes a very strong person to find happiness in a concentration camp, but it is possible.
On the other hand, some people will never be happy no matter how good their environment is. For example, Satan was dissatisfied in Paradise for he wanted more. He was burning within his own 'internal hell' even when in God's presence.
Hell as well as heaven lies within for it is not the environment itself that dictates our feelings, but our interpretation of it. Jesus himself said, "The Kingdom of God is within you." (Luke 17:21b) We have the power to be happy (or unhappy) no matter how things are going on the 'outside'.
MC believed this and went on to say that the first step to happiness is 'learning to control consciousness'. Those who take the time to master their inner domains are on their way to the kingdom within. Granted, this is just the first step on a long, hard journey. One must also be continually growing (MC called it "reaching greater levels of complexity") for "joy is never stagnant" (Henri J. M. Nouwen).
The hard work though (at least I am hoping) will be well worth it. |
It seems like I get attacked in all my dreams.
Lately, I have been attacked by:
-James Bond
-Mob of angry rednecks
-Guard dogs (a larger, scarier version of Monty Burn's guard dogs from the Simpson's)
-Pastor Bill
-9-foot tall Kevin Greb (what a bizarre dream that was!)
This is nothing new. I have been attacked in dreams ever since high school.
Back then I would usually run like there is no tomorrow! Strangely enough, when I am being chased in a dream I usually have the ability to fly away, which is so cool. The combination of fear and excitement make for an exhilarating dream.
Lately, I find myself taking on the attacker more with mixed results. Pastor Bill and I went at it all night and I couldn't even faze him! James Bond wiped the floor with me.
I read a psychology book on dreams and there are many theories as to what they are for. Humans 'dream' all the time when they enter the REM sleep stage, but usually forget. Most dreams seem to be a way for the brain to clean, test, and or organize itself.
Bulkeley argued that some dreams have a deeper meaning. He called these 'big dreams', dreams that are reoccurring, emotionally charged, and or extremely vivid. These are the dreams that stick with you, dreams that you can't possibly forget. He recommended writing them down and taking some time to think them over.
He said to:
1. Ask yourself why your brain, out if the infinite possibilities picked what it did and not something else. (Why am I fighting a 9-foot Kevin Greb and not a 20-foot tray of burnt peach cobbler?).
2. Focus on abrupt and unexpected changes, vivid spots, and unrealistic elements.
3. Tell someone about it and have that person ask questions and share thoughts.
I have been thinking about these dreams. The book mentioned that dreams of violent struggles might hint at violent, unconscious internal struggles. For example, maybe my battle with Pastor Bill suggests an internal battle with religion. Who knows? Maybe I am reading too much into it. |
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He-Man
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May. 30th, 2005 @ 01:02 pm
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I discovered that one of my landlady's mirrors is distorted. Any male who stands in front of it looks like He-Man/Jeremy Camp!! Builds self-confidence though sadly it's just an illusion.
In a sense, people are like mirrors. I am sure most of you would agree that one of the best ways to know who you really are is to spend time in public and objectively take note of how others react to your behavior. Their reaction gives you feedback on how you 'look' to them. For example, if everyone's eyes start to glaze over when you speak maybe you're boring, whereas if everyone laughs at your jokes maybe you're funny. This is just common sense really, most psychology is.
I hate to say it, but I believe I am a distorted mirror in that I give feedback that is generally more positive than what I actually see. For example, I try hard to appear interested even when the other person is boring me to tears. I justify this with the idea that I am making the other person feel good about themselves. Sometimes, it gives the other person the confidence to speak more enthusiastically and they become more interesting. However, this is not always the case. Other times it just encourages the other person to drone on indefinitely. Is distorting the truth in this sense right? For in a way, I am lying.
However, it's tricky business pointing other's flaws directly or indirectly. First, one needs to be upright (it's hard to trust a dirty mirror). Also, one can't go overboard, if one criticizes too much the other may be overwhelmed by painful shame and shut out what you have to say. I heard 3 praises for every 1 criticism is a good rule to live by even if you have to struggle to find something good to say. |
| » hideously long meeting |
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Last night, I attended a hideously long, 6-hour, Community Help Centre meeting, officially the 2nd. longest meeting in CHC history! The longest took place in the 70's and dragged on for 9.5 (!) hours. Apparently, it dealt with whether the hotline counselors should be allowed to smoke marijuana on the grounds (I'm dead serious!).
Anyways. . In this meeting, we were deadlocked over whom to hire as the new program coordinator. There were two candidates in the running, both with very different personalities.
Leannie, who is a warm caring people person. She is very popular and is friends with most everyone in the agency.
Bill, who is a VERY smart, and driven. Nice guy, but keeps to himself. Most people didn't know him that well.
I believe Bill blew Leannie out of the water in the interview process. His resume was stronger and he performed better in the Q/A session and role-plays. To me, it was pretty obvious that Bill was the better candidate.
However, despite Bill's superior performance, Leannie got the position. Her people skills won her the job.
This experience reminded me of the importance of interpersonal skills in the job market. You can perform well, even brilliantly, at your job, but if the boss/coworkers don't know/like you, your work may go unnoticed.
It is easy to get cynical when the Bills of this world get overlooked- not particularly fair, but unfortunately that's the way it is! The smart thing to do is to take the time to work on one's interpersonal skills, getting to know the boss/coworkers even if usually that is not part of the job.
I have seen my friend Samel find a high paying job due in part to his people skills (He talent and hard work didn't hurt either) . He took the time to network, making contacts with all the people he was working for. Eventually, it paid off!
Good personal skills + talent/hard work = success in the job market and (in some cases) mucho dinero!
May. 28th, 2005 @ 12:39 am
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| » Woodpile |
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Animals amaze me.
One of my clients (we'll just call him Bill) and I were on a walk and I noticed that this nasty looking cat was following us. I thought to myself, "That's odd, cats generally will not follow you unless you have something they want. Wow, looks hideous! Maybe there's something wrong with it."
Almost a full mile away from Bill's house, this repulsive looking animal was still trailing us! I pointed this out to Bill.
"Oh that’s a stray cat that lives in my woodpile." He said, "She has been extremely protective of me ever since I've been sick. Somehow, she knows I am not well and she is worried something might happen to me."
That comment surprised me. How does this stray cat know that Bill is not well? I couldn't tell just by looking at him. He looks pretty healthy though cancer is doing a number on him internally.
I have read about how animals 'know' things. For example, some animals know that a big storm is coming and take shelter. I don't know how they know; it baffles me.
May. 17th, 2005 @ 12:01 pm
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| » Foggy Brain |
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Lately I have been getting these chain emails promoting mass fortune and I am sure you have too. Something about forwarding some information for Intel and AOL. Apparently, if I forward this email to all my friends, I will receive a huge paycheck later on!
Here are some quotes from this email:
"Bill Gates is sharing his fortune!"
"When you forward this e-mail to friends, Intel can and will track it and pay you!"
"I received a check for $24,800.00!!"
"If you ignore this, you will repent later!"
I knew that it had to be a hoax (Bill Gates writing you a check for merely forwarding an email? Come on!), but felt this strange pull and I hesitated before deleting it.
I started to think what if . . .
What if it's true?
What if I do this and really do get a huge check in the mail?
My mind started to go off into Fantasyland . . . I started to think about a life without financial worry:
"I could pay for grad school without going into debt!"
"I wont have to worry about making enough to pay rent or my car breaking down!"
Pleasant thoughts like this seemed to put me in a trance. I started to consider it:
"It's worth a shot, what do I have to lose?"
"Who cares if my friends get annoyed, they'll get over it."
Luckily, I snapped out of it (thank you Aaron). However, some of my friends (who are smart, competent, college educated students) fell for it, which is how I got this email in the first place (four times).
I felt this same, strange pull when I was in an Indian Casino over spring break. I knew that the odds of actually winning are always against you, but what if . . .
"What if I actually get lucky and do win?"
Again, I was able to resist, but some of my friends couldn’t.
The promise of instant wealth has a way of fogging my brain; I can't think straight and logic and morality seem to fade into the background (lust does the same thing).
By the way . . . if my forwarding friends actually do get a check, I will murder them all in cold blood.
May. 5th, 2005 @ 11:58 am
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| » to seek or not to seek |
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I should have posted this earlier, but the internet was down. . . Anyways. . .
To seek or not to seek a spouse? Mike C asked this question during men's group and no one could give him a straight answer.
Observe two seemingly contradictory passages within the Bible:
Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for you to remain as you are. Are you married? Do not seek a divorce. Are you unmarried? Do not look for a wife.
-1 Corinthians 7:27
Translation: Getting married doesn't make you a better Christian so why waste your time/energy looking for a spouse? There are more important things to do! Instead, focus all you energy on serving God.
Second passage:
He who finds a wife finds what is good
and receives favor from the LORD.
-Proverbs 18:22
Translation: Find a godly spouse and you shall be blessed!
Who is right? Here are some points to consider:
1. Maybe Paul was biased. After all, he was single (see 1 Corinthians 7:7).
2. Maybe King Solomon was biased. After all, he had 700(!) wives (see 1 Kings 11:3).
3. King Solomon was the wisest man to of ever lived (1 Kings 3:127) and Paul wasn't (Mike C brought up this point).
4. Paul's teaching was a New Testament teaching. Maybe it should be held in higher regard because of the 'new convenient'.
5. Back then, arranged marriages were prevalent and there was no dating.
I asked Pastor Tom (a.k.a. Gandalf) this on the way up to Scranton. Here are two other points that he brought up.
6. In King Solomon's time, males had to put more effort into finding a wife. They generally had to search harder and travel more for the people living near them where usually related. (This is especially true since King Solomon was hogging them all! BOO!)
7. Paul was convinced Jesus was coming VERY soon, as in within his lifetime. There is a good chance Jesus will come in a year or so therefore, it doesn't make sense to look for a wife. Maybe if Paul knew Jesus wasn't going to come so soon his teachings would have been different.
On a side note, there are lots of passages within the Bible that seem to contradict and if you ever curious look this up. There are tons!
Here is a good Old Testament example: (2 Kings 24:8; 2 Chronicles 36:9).
Here is a New Testament example on Jesus' last words: (Matthew 27:46,50; Luke 23:46; John 19:30).
These bother me, but it is important not to dismiss the entire Bible based on these (I forget where I got this quote from):
Inaccuracies or conflicting accounts do not invalidate the gems of historic and spiritual truth contained therein -- we need not throw out the baby with the bath water. However, such discrepancies indicate that we would be equally foolish to accept blindly each word or passage of the Bible as an absolute truth, the uncontestable word of God, unless of course we were trying to claim God has a sick sense of humor and is trying to lead us astray by confusing us.
However, it does effect how I read the Bible. What should I do if there is a command within the Bible that doesn't make sense to me?
To seek or not to seek? Pastor Tom recommended looking a little, but not too hard; in other words, finding a balance between these two passages. This makes perfect sense to me.
Apr. 28th, 2005 @ 10:11 pm
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| » EVIL LANDLADY |
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My landlady blew up on me last night :/
This was not the first time this has happened and probably will not be the last :(
I am probably extremely biased towards myself (as all people are when telling these stories), but I believe I did nothing wrong and she's being nit picky. I believe her anger stems from something else, not my own actions.
I could be wrong, but I think I have noticed a pattern: Something bad happens to her and a day or so later, she becomes the EVIL LANDLADY. Suddenly, nothing I do is right and I get chewed out about it. I believe I become her whipping boy; she takes out all her anger out on me.
I guess I make the ideal candidate: I am around, I don't fight back (I need to work on confronting people), and she doesn't know me. I am just some guy who lives in her basement. It is easy to mistreat someone you don't know because it is so easy to see them as a mere object instead of a person. One thing they try to do in war propaganda is to dehumanize the opponent.
I think I have the solution though. It occurred to me that maybe I should spend more time just talking with her. She really likes to talk and I could be wrong, but I do think she treats me better when I do. I become more human to her (I'm not just some random annoying guy), and she also becomes more human to me (she's no longer some random demonic woman).
This is a struggle for me for I am introverted. I grew up that way; this is the role I am most comfortable playing. I come home after interacting with clients/friends/coworkers and I just want some time to myself. I don't feel like talking to anyone, especially the EVIL LANDLADY!
I told God last night I didn't want to do it; I'm introverted. I have made enough progress getting in touch with my extraverted self, thank you very much. God replies I have a long way to go.
We all have different 'selfs', different roles we can play depending on the situation/environment (thinking self, feeling self, child, parent, introvert, extrovert, etc). The more 'selfs' you are in touch with, the more flexible you are. You a comfortable in a wider range of environments/situations. People who are in touch with their 'selfs' are happier and have better relationships for they can connect more effectively with a wider range of people according to the research I read. It seems that I need to break out my 'extraverted self' for this is the best role to play in this particular situation.
Man, I don't want to! I play that role enough in public. I look forward to heaven when I don't have to keep changing; I can just chill out.
Apr. 21st, 2005 @ 11:37 am
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| » Death blooms |
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The day which we fear as our last is but the birthday of eternity.
~Seneca
The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
~Mark Twain
This past Saturday, I received my first hospice client. For those of you who don't know, A Hospice client has decided to stop treatments and go home to spend the last few days/weeks/months of his or her life surrounded by friends and family. The focus of me, the hospice worker, is pain relief, making the client as comfortable as possible.
This man I am working with is in rough shape and can definitely go at any time, I will spare you the gory details (they make me queasy!). It is kind of sad working with a terminally ill client though it is comforting to know he is pain free and surrounded by his family.
There is so much I want to ask this client: Do you feel you are ready to go? What do you think awaits you on the other side? Do you believe in God? Etc. I don't though for I just met this guy and even talking is a burden for him.
Working with this client has reminded me of my own morality. Very soon, I will be that frail old man; very soon I will face death.
Sounds morbid, but it is actually kind of inspiring. In a race, the participant can run hard knowing there is a finish line. In life, one can 'live hard' knowing there is death. Running hard/living hard is painful, but knowing there is an end makes the pain more bearable.
Also, I am reminded that life is short. I waste so much time; I can't be doing that!
Apr. 19th, 2005 @ 12:47 pm
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| » Emo |
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What good are emotions? Do they serve any meaningful purpose? I used to believe that emotions were useless and even detrimental. What good is depression when you don't feel like doing anything? What good is anger when you just end up doing/saying something offensive? I used to believe that emotions were fun to experience (the positive ones anyways), but that they merely clouded sound judgment.
I believe the show Star Trek holds this viewpoint. Notice how the majority of the characters are cold and calculating, Spock is a prime example. Consider the fact that this show takes place in the future. The assumption I make, is that as the human race evolved and as they got more intelligent, they realized that emotions get in the way of rational thought and learned to do away with them.
However, the more I read in psychology and the Bible, the more I have become convinced that emotions are useful IF we understand them.
Jesus experienced a wide spectrum of emotions:
He wept (John 11:35)
He was astonished (Matt. 8:10)
He was deeply distressed (John 3:5)
He was zealous (John 2:17)
He groaned in the spirit (John 11:33-34)
He rejoiced (Luke 15:5-6)
He was angry (Matt 21:12-13)
He felt compassion (Matt 9:36)
He loved (John 11:3-5)
He was joyful (John 15:9-11)
He was peaceful (John 16:32-33)
He was sorrowful (Matt 26:38)
He was indignant (Mark 10:14)
He was amazed (Mark 6:6)
He desired (Luke 22:15)
I believe God gave us emotions for a reason but what is that reason?
Emotions seem to be the brain's way of highlighting important information that comes through the 5 senses, they say "here look at this, this is important". At the same time, they make a judgment about this information and 'tell' the individual what to do. Here is an illustration: A dog approaches two guys: One guy feels scared; his body is making a judgment about that dog (this dog is dangerous) His mind is telling him to keep his distance. The second guy feels happy; his brain is making another judgment (dogs are fun) His mind is telling him to approach it. Both became more aware of the dog as a result of how they felt. Michael P. Nichols, Ph.D. put it this way, "Every emotion propels us to action and every emotion has its uses." He went on to give some examples, "Anxiety is the fear of danger, known or unknown; it urges us to run. Love's aim is for union. Shame makes us want to hide."
Emotions are a tool that can be used by the mind. M. Scott Peck believed that the mind should be put above emotion. For example, you feel shame and want to go and hide. Peck believed you should use your mind to question that emotion, explore it before acting for your feelings are not perfect; maybe it is not the best idea to run and hide during a speech! In M. Scott Peck's opinion, the mind should weight the feeling into its decision, but ultimately the mind should make the last call.
Feelings can be changed though they are hard to change. This is very different from our thoughts which can change almost instantly. For example, say you are afraid of flying. Statistics show that flying is pretty safe, a lot safer than driving actually. If you read these statistics your idea of flying may change instantly. However, it may be along time before the anxiety goes away when you board an airplane. Likewise, if someone really hurt us, it can be very hard to let go of the feelings of hurt or anger.
Emotion is based on past experience. For example, we fall in love with someone because our brain sees things in that person that it likes. A lot 'those things the brain sees is based on past experience, 'things' that gave pleasure in the past. However, it can be to hard understand what the brain likes exactly. Why do I fall in love with this person and not that person? We may think we know (its her sense of humor), but this is just an educated guess, who knows?
Conclusion:
Emotions are an important tool and can be useful if understood. Emotions are a tool used by the mind; the mind should be set above feelings and should make the last call. I believe when we experience an emotion, it is a good idea to explore it and gain insight from it. We should ask ourselves why we feel this way and what we should do about it. We should not ignore our feelings for they are trying to tell us something. Our feelings are not always correct, if they are not correct they can be worked through and changed, but that takes time.
Apr. 15th, 2005 @ 11:32 am
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| » Humoring the old man |
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My father came to visit this past Monday and he came bearing a list of questions from my mother and grandmother who couldn't come. It was not surprising that the majority of their questions had to do with relationships.
I humored the old man and answered all of the questions and we had a good conversation. I am glad we have reached a point in our relationship where we can talk as equals. Before, I felt as if I was talking up to him for he was the father and had a lot of power over me.
Anyways, in the mist of the conversation, I confided in that I used to get extremely nervous around girls in the past, but I have pretty much gotten over that. However, I still struggle in that I have these old habits that have been formed as a result of my nervousness, these old ways of acting around girls that have become comfortable for me over time. In the past, I was always nervous around girls and that this nervousness caused me to act a certain way. Over time, bad habits were formed. I mentioned to him how it is not easy for me to break these old habits, but that I am working hard toward that.
My father mentioned that he used to get nervous around women when he was young as well and then he made an interesting observation:
He said that guys that grow up without any sisters are more likely to struggle with being nervous around women while guys that grew up with sisters are more at ease.
He pointed to the fact that he had no sisters and that I had no sisters and we both struggled with nervousness around women. He also pointed out that my mother had 8 brothers and that she was at ease around him when they dated which is one of the reasons he liked her so much; since she was at ease, it put him at ease. He was free from his nervousness and could be himself.
This makes a lot of sense. Guys and girls that seem most at ease around the opposite sex generally had a sibling of the opposite sex. They don't see them as a big deal because they have spent so much time around their opposite sex siblings growing up.
Apr. 14th, 2005 @ 11:39 am
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| » Paul Bunyan |
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I believe that God is love, love in its most perfect state (See 1 John 4:8 and 1 John 4:16). I also believe that everything else that we associate with God (such as wisdom) are merely tools that he uses to increase love.
To use an illustration, think of God as Paul Bunyan and wisdom as his ax (for Lord of the ring fans, think of God as a Legolas and wisdom as his bow and arrows!).
The ax is so much a part of Paul Bunyan that it kind of 'is' Paul Bunyan. However, Paul Bunyan and his ax are clearly separate from one another and the ax is merely a tool that he uses.
Wisdom is so much a part of God that it kind of 'is' God, but it is merely a tool that God uses. Wisdom was, in fact, created by God (Proverbs 8:22) as the first of his works which shows that they are separate entities. God uses wisdom to increase love and wisdom is meaningless without love. (See 1 Corinthians 13:2).
I think the idea that God is love and that we are in a way worshiping love is really cool and I believe that this makes Christianity easier to understand. In the few times I have attempted to witness to someone, I was usually (ok always) met with confused looks. . . Jesus, God, sin, resurrection, faith, etc. . I is hard to explain all this "Christian lingo" to someone who has never heard it before. Now I just say God is love, Christianity is all about love and go on from there. I believe it is a more effective approach.
Apr. 11th, 2005 @ 08:09 pm
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| » TV is the devil |
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After I returned from Peru, I saw things differently. For instance, I began to strongly dislike television. I did some research and this essay is a result:
Eight reasons why TV is the devil. . .
1. TV is physically unhealthy.
The easiest way to reduce inactivity is to turn off the TV set. Almost everything uses more energy than watching TV.
-Dr. William Diez
Most every muscle in your body/mind is inactive when you watch TV. You are not really thinking and you are definitely not moving. It comes as no surprise that TV is correlated with obesity and Type 2 diabetes.
2. TV is mentally unhealthy.
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. -Groucho Marx
When you are watching TV, the brain shuts down for the most part. It doesn't really have to do anything except passively take in information. Unfortunately, if you don't use your brain you will lose it. TV watching is linked to Alzheimer's and Dementia.
3. TV is socially unhealthy.
In many families the television seems to substitute, rather than facilitate dialogue among people. A type of 'fast' in this area could also be healthy.
-Pope John Paul II
May of us watch TV alone. Obviously, this is not healthy socially. However, even if we are watching with friends, we are not truly interacting. Conversations when watching TV are brief and generally consist of small talk about the program itself. I remember having little three minute 'commercial conversations' with my family and when the program came on, no one was really allowed to talk. This is not real conversation! If we took this time to actually have meaningful conversations with our friends/family, we would be a lot better off.
4. TV is psychologically unhealthy.
The remarkable thing about television is that it permits several million people to laugh at the same joke and still feel lonely.
-T.S. Eliot
Many of us turn on the TV as a way to ease our psychological pain, a term called "passive escapism" in the field of psychology. What happens is that you begin to feel angry, depressed, lonely etc. but instead of dealing with those feelings, and the problems behind them, you ignore them by distracting yourself with TV. TV keeps your brain occupied so that it can't 'hear' the pain. Unfortunately, these feelings/problems will not go away and may fester and get worse. We need to stop and take the time to work through our problems instead of denying them.
It is interesting to note that TV can also be the cause of our distress. For instance, I am sure you have noticed that everyone on TV is extremely attractive and appear to be happy. I have found that the TV characters that are not attractive are generally evil/morons/comic relief. The assumption we make is that we need to be attractive to be happy. If you constantly bombard someone with an idea over and over again eventually they will believe it. TV bombards us with some pretty unhealthy ideas.
5. TV is immoral.
66% of the children watched at least one program a month that contained nudity or heavy sexual content.
-Godfrey Ellis, Oklahoma State University professor
Many TV shows are obscene and it seems to be getting worse. Even if you are watching a wholesome TV show, you still have to watch out for the commercials! As Christians we really need to be careful for it says in Matthew 6:22 that "The eye is a lamp to the body." We have to watch what we allow to flow into our bodies, garbage in garbage out.
6. TV encourages consumerism
Amount of money spent in 1999 on advertising for public television: 40 billion.
-1999 U.S. Advertising Volume
Lets be honest, commercials do influence our behavior as much as we would like to believe otherwise. If commercials didn't influence us why would businesses spend so much? Consumerism is a huge problem in the United States, we consume and waste so much and other countries hate us as a result. TV and its relentless advertising play a significant role in this problem.
7. TV is a waste of money.
The national average monthly cost of cable TV service and equipment increased by 8.2 percent, from $37.06 to $40.11, over the 12-month period ending July 1, 2002.
-Federal Communications Commission (FCC).
Cable/Satellite is expensive. For instance, the average cost of cable is forty dollars a month. This money can be better spent. Ironically, you can help alleviate world hunger and feed a starving individual for about thirty dollars a month. Tell me, what is a better use of your money?
8. TV is a waste of time.
The average American watches more than 4 hours of TV a day.
--Nielson Media Research 2000
The average American watches more than 4 hours of TV a day. That’s almost 13 years of your entire life if you do the math! Thirteen years! That is a tragedy in my opinion. Time is so valuable and life is so short; we need to make the most of it.
Conclusion
It hurts to see what TV is doing to us. Walk into most any house and you might notice that the couches and chairs of the living room are facing the TV in a neat little semi circle. What does that say about us?
I gave up TV about 2 years ago and I feel that it has made a huge difference in my life. Granted, I still (usually begrudgingly) watch TV when my friends want to, but that doesn't happen very often.
I would like all of you to consider giving up or at least cutting back on your TV consumption. College is a good time to do this for it is easy to find alternative ways to fill your time. It can be hard to give up TV for it is entertaining, but in the long run you will not regret it.
Apr. 7th, 2005 @ 11:24 pm
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Yep, I decided to start journaling online. Enjoy!
I will start it off with my Peru mission trip testimony, a life changing experience. It is a little sad, but I believe in all worked out for the best.
Peru Testimony
My life changed when I took a mission’s trip to Pucusana, Peru. Before, I thought that I was a decent Christian because I went to Christian social events and did the things that Christians are supposed to do. However, I didn’t know what it truly means to be a servant and give everything.
I have never been on a short-term mission’s trip overseas because I thought they were a waste. I thought they were a waste of money for traveling is expensive and the money used to buy the plane tickets could be invested in other things. Second, I thought they are a waste of time because they last only a week or so. How much good can you really do in 10 days when it takes a couple days to travel and get acquainted with the new environment? I had this idea that those who went of mission’s trips were merely doing it to feel good about themselves and were not doing all that they could do with their resources.
A Penn State Christian fellowship called ACF was sponsoring a short-term mission’s trip to Peru. Of course, I wasn’t particularly interested. However, one of my closest friends talked me into going. He asked me if I was going on the mission’s trip and I told him that I would love to go, but I didn’t think it was worth spending 1,500 dollars. He told me that if money is the only thing holding you back you should go because it is something that everyone should experience at least once (he has been on 4 mission trips). Though this wasn't really the only thing holding me back, I looked up to my friend because he was a very wise man. I promised him I would give it some thought. While praying about it for a while, I felt like God was telling me to go. Rationally, it didn't make sense, but I was definitely feeling something. To this day, I have trouble explaining how I felt exactly, but I definitely was feeling a 'pull'.
I was surprised at how easy it was to raise the money. My church contributed a lot and so did my family and friends. When I had the 1,500 dollars raised, I was given a definite spot on the mission’s team. It looked as if this trip was actually going to happen!
Pastor Aaron, our mission’s team leader, required us to attend meetings designed to help prepare us for what we were going to encounter in Peru. Many of us (such as myself) have never been on a mission’s trip so we did not know what we were getting our selves into. During one meeting, Pastor Aaron had a long-term Peruvian missionary come in teach us about Pucusana, which was where we were going to serve.
In his presentation, I learned that Pucusana was one of the poorest areas in Peru with an unemployment rate of over 70 (!) percent. This missionary showed us pictures of shanty villages and impoverished families; shared some statistics, and became emotional when he shared some personal stories. I remember thinking how sad it is that poverty like that still exists but my heart wasn’t affected. After the presentation, Aaron encouraged us to pray more to prepare ourselves as the trip date approached.
To be honest, I was not that excited about going on this trip even as the departure date approached. I was mildly curious merely because I have never been on one and I have never been overseas, but my heart wasn’t in it.
I took Aaron’s advice and prayed a lot about the trip especially in the week right before. I asked God to help our team and to make the trip worthwhile, and I asked to be changed.
There was 18 hours of travel time to get to Peru. We had to take a bus to Pittsburgh airport, transfer in Houston, and finally fly to Peru. Around the 10th hour, I was really getting ‘jetlagged’ and was starting to even regret going on the trip. I begin to feel cynical. I remember thinking what is the point? What is the point spending all this time/money/energy traveling? I even started to question the point of life in general. What is that point? At the time, I couldn't think of I decent response.
However, there is a point. What I saw in Peru gave my life a renewed purpose. Over the ten days, I saw some pretty disturbing things; my heart broke. I saw poverty that was indescribable, people who had nothing and were literally starving. It sounds bad, but I believe what I saw down there made me a stronger person.
On a side note, it wasn’t all gloom and doom. In fact, I actually had a good time. Most of the Christians we met were very happy despite their intense poverty, on a whole, more joyful than the Christians in the United States. I could see it in their faces. It goes to show that money has little effect on happiness.
I was most deeply affected by something that happened halfway through the trip. Our team was heading by bus to an impoverished church to do construction work. On the way, we drove past a huge, garbage heap. It is important to mention that garbage heaps are a common sight in Pucusana which is basically sand, garbage, and shanties as far as the eye can see. Garbage was basically everywhere.
One garbage heap we drove pasted was especially large, miles long. The stench was overpowering and it gave me a headache. I looked out the window and saw twenty possibly thirty people rooting around amongst the garbage, a sight that troubled me as I considered what it was like for them. I could not imagine what the smell was like out there!
As we continued to drive, I saw a woman walking through the heaps not too far off the road. Her skin was streaked with dirt and her hair was black and matty. She was wearing ragged clothes, just covered in the filth she was surrounded by. This woman heard us coming and turned around, briefly we looked at each other and I saw the pain in her eyes. Pain that was much deeper than any pain I can ever remember sensing in another person; pain that was incomprehensible. I also noticed that she was pregnant.
At the time, it didn't hit me; I felt numb more than anything else. I guess my mind didn't allow it to register fully because I still had a couple days left and couldn't afford to be distracted. It didn’t hit me until I got back to the United States where I was able to think over what I saw.
Aaron told us it would be hard returning to the US, he called it “reverse culture shock.” He was right. It was not easy for me to see all the food we have knowing that there was people overseas who had none. It was tough to hear others complain about petty things when I knew they have no right. It was especially rough to look see the luggage others were carrying and realize for the first time how materialistic we are as a nation. It was painful to look at my self and all my ‘stuff’ and know that I am part of the problem.
When I returned to the US, I was able to think over what I saw. I know it sounds morbid to think about such things, but I knew (as a psychology major) that I would have to do this for "those who repress their past must carry all of its burdens."
So that is what I did. I took many long walks and started to journal about it. Slowly, the memories became more conscious and I poured over them. I thought about what it was like for that pregnant woman to live like that. I wondered if her baby would survive and if so, what it would be like to grow up in a shanty outside a dump; having to sleep with the rats and eat rotting food.
Over time, I became struck by my memories and I began to mourn. I wept for all those who were starving and for Peru, I wept for the pregnant woman and her baby, I wept for the hypocrisy of American Christians and for my own. It felt good to let go though once in a while, I still cry about it.
I vowed to change. I promised God I would work harder at becoming a better person and make a difference with my life. I got rid of most of my 'stuff '(though after writing this, I believe I should get rid of some more). Who am I to buy designer clothes and stuff that I don’t really need when others have nothing and are starving?
After the mission’s trip, my outlook on life has changed a lot. The verse "Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted." (Matthew 5:4) comes to mind. I experience a lot more joy now. It is easy to be happy when you are glad just to have something to eat!
I have gained so much insight from this trip. I learned the value of money/time and how we should not waste either. I understand now why some foreign countries hate us so much; our materialism and wastefulness drive them crazy. I learned how pain allows you to grow stronger. I learned how ugly poverty can be and how real it is. I learned that money does not buy happiness. Finally, I have a better idea of what it means to be a Christian. The Bible hits me different now; I find myself wanting to read it more.
My friend was right; mission trip’s are something that needs to be experienced. I recommend that anyone seriously consider taking a mission's trip overseas it for it can be life changing (it was for me!). If you want a real spiritual challenge, go to poorest areas of the poorest countries, but be sure to prepare yourself with prayer. It will be painful to see, but you will be changed.
!Dios de bendiga! (God Bless you)
Apr. 5th, 2005 @ 06:22 pm
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